Recently I met Avinash at Delhi Airport. A 6 ft tall man having wonderful smile on face. I was surprised that he still remembered our last meet-up of Dec 2016 as we had a small interaction, and it was really amazing. While taking coffee he shared a recent story about him. The story was quite relatable, so let’s go through the story first.
Once Avinash visited Ahemdabad for a seminar after the seminar he took flight and landed to his hometown airport. After reaching he was waiting for his taxi, suddenly he saw a beautiful lady passing through him. The moment Avinash saw this lady’s face, it seemed familiar. Where have I met her before?
He immediately went over and stopped the lady and asked her, ” Madam, I am Avinash from Lucknow. I am good in remembering names and faces of people I met. Due to this only friends call me dictionary as I remember everything. Your face seems familiar to me could you please help me out in recognizing you. “
“Please go ahead”, the lady replied.
Avinash thought a while and said, “Madam, by any chance did we meet in New Delhi at CP in Haldiram restaurant on 24th of July 2020.”
The lady replied, “Sorry Sir I have never been to Delhi.”
Avinash failed for the first time, but he did not give up.
He said, “Madam, Did we meet at Chhatrapati Shivaji Airport, Mumbai on 1st August 2020.”
“No chance I have never been to to Mumbai or Chhatrapati Shivaji Airport in my lifetime”, replied the lady.
Avinash failed again but he wanted to try for the last and final time.
He said, “Madam, Did we meet in Varanasi at Hotel Taj on 5th August 2020.”
Till now the lady was Furious and said, “I was in my kitchen and house since March 2020 as there was a lockdown all over India. So there’s no chance we met there.”
Avinash had failed again.
He said, “Madam I am sorry. For some unknown reason, my memory does not seem to be working. If you don’t mind, can you please tell me who you are.
The lady looked Avinash up and down and said, “Mr. Avinash, I am Parvati, your wife.”
And after listening to this story I was shocked. If such thing can happen to a person like Avinash, then I am sure it has happened to all others at some point in our life.
In my profession I meet at least 20-25 strangers everyday, these meetings are of 1 or 2 minute and during this we don’t get so much of time to introduce ourselves. So it’s difficult for me too to remember the names of the people whom I just met. And I thing everyone has the same issue.
So let’s focus why we forget names and faces so easily. Suppose you’re introduced to ten person at a birthday party. You know that this is a casual social meeting and you will perhaps never meet those five person again. Since there is little you have in common with them.
What your mind does then is ignored the information and it is not recorded and forgotten very soon. We can take another example, while travelling in bus or train, we meet many passengers sitting beside us if the journey is long we introduce to each other. But during this also mind ignores the information because we think in future there’s less opportunity to meet again.
Above condition can be okay in many aspects but problem arises, if you forget the names of people we know well like- colleagues, friends, relatives. It is very important that we remember names of people whom we meet. Dale Carnegie has rightly said, ” A person’s name is the sweetest sound in any language to that person.” He also did research to find out what people wrote after buying a pen to check whether it was writing or not.
It was found that 95% people in the world either write their name or do their signature to check the pen. This means that people generally love their names. If we can call the people by their name they will start loving us too.
But the general tendency is that when we go to a hotel or a restaurant we generally say, “Waiter, please give the menu card” or “Waiter, please bring a glass of water.” When we travel through a bus or train we call them as a conductor or TTE for tickets. These references are quite common. But these can make a difference in the world, if we called people by their names.
I have read somewhere that Einstein remember the name of his followers same with Mahatma Gandhi. Napoleon too remember the names of all his soldiers. These are just simple example to show that all great people generally remember a large number of names. Here is a simple 3 the formula to remember people’s name always and every time you meet them. ( Do read 7 Ways To Make Smile Perfect )
When you meet people generally we do namaste or do a handshake. But most often when the other person is introducing himself, we did not pay attention because we are busy thinking how best to introduce ourselves. If we pay attention and listen to the other person, there’s a way we can remember the person’s name later. Next time Whenever you meet a person just hold for sometime, have focus on his introduction, give some time to the other person. And have a smile on your face.
When you meet a person, try repeating his or her name as many times as possible in the conversation. Show Mr. Avinash what do you do?, “What is your goal Avinash?”, “It was nice to meet you Avinash.”
When you repeat the name, it gets register in your permanent memory, and secondly the other person will feel special after hearing the name. These two step will help you recall a person’s face and also his name immediately and this repetition to be done in a subtle manner, so that the other person does not get irritated.
The third step is very easy. You have to find a way to connect the name with any remembering thing. Let me explain with example, If I have to remember about Avinash, I will connect him with the dictionary because he memorizes every name. If I have met a stranger on railway station while travelling from Delhi to Mumbai, I will save his number with Train journey only.
Similarly you can remember people’s name by Linking or connecting with your friends Names, Relatives Relation, Names of God, Historical figures or Indian Warriors. Initially you will become very conscious while putting the above steps into practice but with continuous practice it becomes habit. When you follow these three steps, it will be very easy to remember people’s name. Always remember people love their name.